A Boy Named Suetonius

Copyediting 101: Gay Marriage via Chinese Takeout

2009-05-28T16:18:00.005-04:00

Check out the screen cap of the newest anti-gay marriage ad (from the people that brought you The Big Gay Storm):

(Courtesy of Sadly, No!, who added the red underline for emphasis.)

Running the risk of being culturally insensitive, the way the ad was run makes it seem as if the number you're going to call will be answered by an immigrant at a Chinese takeout:

Caller: Hello? I'd like to preserve marriage. Please don't let the gays marry.

Senator Tso and Tso's office: Marraige? No like Same Same?

Caller: No. I don't want Same Same.

Senator Tso and Tso's office: Ok. No Same Same. 30-40 minits before vote. Tank you!

To be clear: I am having a little fun with--not at the expense of--entrepreneurs who know at least one more language than I do who have managed to come to a new country and run a successful business. In no way is this meant to disparage the Chinese or any other immigrant group. (Jeebus, I hate disclaimers.)

This is, however, fully intended to mock the people who spend so much time and money on an issue that really doesn't effect them, lest they think their spouse is going to leave them for a gay lover once gay marriage is legal.

Maybe these morons should spend less time worrying about Teh Gays and more time worrying about education, grammar, and spell check.

Jesus Saves!!!

2009-05-20T17:18:00.004-04:00

...at WAL-MART

Apparently Offering/Tithing is down recently, so Jesus is getting frugal. No one is safe in this economy.

H/T @God 's Twitter Feed

More Evidence of Israeli Cruelty

2009-05-11T19:44:00.004-04:00

I mean honestly. Giving Palestinian children pool toys...IN THE DESERT. Bastards.

H/T Time.

Afternoon Dance Party: Fornicating Mermaid Edition

2009-05-08T15:47:00.005-04:00

Audio NSFW:

You've probably already seen it, but it got stuck in my head today, so I thought I'd share.

Enjoy your weekend!

Non-Aggression Principle, Reconsidered

2009-05-04T13:16:00.013-04:00

One of the problems I have harbored for sometime with standard libertarian thought is the "non-aggression principle"--at least as it is meant to apply universally. Keep in mind, I am a natural rights guy (Hey, just because I mock Jesus and his followers on occasion doesn't mean that whole "do unto others" bit doesn't hold water), but I try not to be so dogmatic as to never acknowledge that certain people whose behavior (or very existence) is so heinous that it suggests they may deserve an ass-kicking for their own good--if not on some Karmic level of justice.

Thus, allow me to introduce a new segment to BNS: The Non-Aggression Principle: The Argument Against. This award will go to one person per week (or so) who challenge the axiom of libertarian non-violence without physical provocation.

Our debut NAPTAA goes to Sgt. Robert McFarland of the Lincoln Park Police Department.

Sgt. McFarland deserves to be made familiar with the business end of a rotary phone while Fran Drescher and Gilbert Gottfried yell profane obscenities suggesting lewd things about his mama, a donkey, and that homeless man in the park who chases the pigeons "because they talk shit."

Congratulations, Sgt. McFarland, you loathsome, uptight little prick. Here's hoping you get yours someday.

H/T reason.

*Nota Bene: In no way am I suggesting actual violence be launched against Sgt. McFarland or any future recipient of the NAPTAA award. The non-aggression principle is a staple of our modern society's Rule of Law and should not be transgressed...even for someone so god awful as he is.

Logic and Religion Just Don't Mix

2009-04-14T13:17:00.002-04:00

Via Will Wilkinson (and by extension Andrew Sullivan):

So, let me get this straight: If you believe God has abandoned you, no one gives a damn about you and thus you should just probably end it all, you worthless shit. Further, Christ--according to Matthew 27:46--exclaimed "My God, My God! Why hast thou forsaken me?" which would lead me to believe that God didn't care about Jesus, and therefore I am under moral obligation to also not care about Jesus.

Q.E.D.

Apparently, my heathen ass sides with God on this one. Who knew?

How Bad is Life in Your Country

2009-04-14T10:30:00.004-04:00

When you'll risk death to get to Iran?

Taliban forces in Afghanistan meted out their brand of Sharia justice this week by executing a 19-year-old woman and 21-year-old-man for the crime of wanting to elope. The couple were shot by a firing squad before witnesses.

The couple was going to try to get to Iran but may have been turned over by their parents or neighbors.

If you follow the link Turley provides, the girl was 14 and the boy was 17. What makes this worse? They were probably turned in by their parents.

You can take your cultural relativism and shove it up your ass. This is just wrong. Yay Freedom.

"What Happened Here Was a Miracle..."

2009-04-11T19:39:00.002-04:00

Afternoon Dance Party: Presidential Protocol Edition

2009-04-09T12:02:00.005-04:00

Since Obama seems to have forgotten American presidents don't bow to monarchs, (or oligarchs, depending on your views on the House of Saud), I thought I'd send a little shout-out to the supplicant-in-chief (NSFW):

(For some reason, I can't find it on SeeqPod, so YouTube it is.)

I Ain't 'Fraid of No Jesus

2009-04-06T14:13:00.001-04:00

Afternoon Dance Party

2009-04-06T12:01:00.002-04:00

New World Order

2009-04-03T14:20:00.001-04:00

Iowa Officially More Progressive than California

2009-04-03T11:51:00.004-04:00

Expected gay migration from San Francisco to Des Moines:

The Iowa Supreme Court this morning unanimously upheld gays’ right to marry.

“The Iowa statute limiting civil marriage to a union between a man and a woman violates the equal protection clause of the Iowa Constitution,” the justices said in a summary of their decision.

The court rules that gay marriage would be legal in three weeks, starting April 24.

In other news, stocks in tasteless "cornhole" jokes are skyrocketing; expected fashion resurgence for flannel and bib overalls; and new gaydar technology being tweaked for urban migrants to differentiate lesbians from farmers' wives.

You Murdered 14,000 People. What Do You Have to Say for Yourself?!?!

2009-03-31T11:55:00.001-04:00

"My bad!...but everybody was doing it!"

PHNOM PENH, Cambodia — The commandant of the most prominent Khmer Rouge torture house apologized in court Tuesday for atrocities he had committed but said that he had feared for his own life and that he was being made a scapegoat for others.
“I would like to express my regret and heartfelt sorrow,” said the commandant, Kaing Guek Eav, also known as Duch, who is the first defendant in a trial involving the deaths of 1.7 million people from 1975 to 1979 from starvation, overwork and disease, as well as torture and execution.

Heartfelt sorrow? Really? Heartfelt sorrow comes out somewhere between death #1 and, say, more than 3 decades later when your tired ass is finally brought to justice.

"Scapegoat" he says. Hmm:

[Prosecutor Robert Petit] illustrated what he said was Duch’s brutality by describing the fate of his “teacher and mentor,” Chay Kim Huor, who recruited him into the communist party in 1964. “Fifteen years later the accused would supervise the torture and execution of Chay,” Petit said. “That single fact I submit as highly revealing.”

Duch's probably right that there are many more people who should be facing trial (and, may I note, the gallows if they allowed the death penalty), but the "just following orders" defense has been tried before. And I still don't buy it.

Any real sense guilt would have manifested itself by now--probably in the form of suicide cum mea culpa--for any human being worth his salt. If there is an argument in favor of the death penalty (and retributive torture), this guy is begging for it.

Amen, Brother!

2009-03-30T09:08:00.002-04:00

And vice versa.

Courtesy of reason.

Afternoon Dance Party

2009-03-26T16:10:00.001-04:00

I know this was an ADP once on F&S, but the song is catchy as hell and fun, so I'm running it again. (And it's not like my love for 80s era Michael Jackson songs has diminished, so get used to repeats every now and again.)

Allah Is His Copilot

2009-03-25T11:48:00.000-04:00

This might explain the inferiority of Arab air forces...

PALERMO (Reuters) - A Tunisian pilot who paused to pray instead of taking emergency measures before crash-landing his plane, killing 16 people, has been sentenced to 10 years in jail by an Italian court...

The 2005 crash at sea off Sicily left survivors swimming for their lives, some clinging to a piece of the fuselage that remained floating after the ATR turbo-prop aircraft splintered upon impact.

A fuel-gauge malfunction was partly to blame but prosecutors also said the pilot succumbed to panic, praying out loud instead of following emergency procedures and then opting to crash-land the plane instead trying to reach a nearby airport.

As Jonathan Turley put it: "There is something to say for having a pilot who has nothing to look forward to in a crash situation."

Since Obama Made Fun of the Special Olympics, Can We?

2009-03-25T00:34:00.000-04:00

YES WE CAN!

Afternoon Dance Party

2009-03-24T23:40:00.001-04:00

Ok. So it's not afternoon. But I wanted to christen the new site with a little music, so here goes:

After F&S

2009-03-24T23:19:00.000-04:00

Yeah, so, it's over.

The recession hit us all and, in the middle of a bunch of other stuff on top of it, Freedom and Shit [dot] org just stopped being a priority for most of us. All of us, really. It was hard enough keeping writers interested--not to mention keep it among my own top priorities. So when the plug was pulled, no one really put up a stink. Hell, it took Tera a couple weeks til she even noticed. I don't blame her really; we all have our own lives and most of us do writing that actually bears our names--and that stuff actually PAYS.

So, I hope you enjoy this site. I highly recommend putting this in an RSS feed if you're going to follow it at all, because frankly, I can't say this is one of the most important things in my life and so the entries will probably be sporadic. I know I'm not selling this all that well, but I've always been honest with my readers--one of the great pleasures of anonymity, let me tell you--so I'm not going to start bullshitting you now. I miss the more irreverent side to my writing, and this is an excellent outlet.

For those used to the F&S format: I'll keep the Afternoon Dance Parties (although I'm switching from videos to SeeqPod) and the topics will pretty much remain the same too. The major difference is that this is all me, and not a pseudo-collaborative project. And that isn't any kind of slight at my friends from the F&S days--priorities changed and there are ZERO hard feelings. It was a lot of fun and I sincerely thank Aynnie for the opportunity to write there and also for keeping the site going for so long after she stopped writing for it.

As before, feedback is always appreciated.

Thanks for reading,

Sue